I Won't Give Up

"I don't wanna be someone who walks away so easily
I'm here to stay and make the difference that I can make
Our differences they do a lot to teach us how to use
The tools and gifts we got, yeah, we got a lot at stakeWe had to learn how to bend without the world caving in
I had to learn what I've got, and what I'm not, and who I am."

 Jason Mraz

Most times when I sit down to write a post I don't know where it is going to go.  I just start typing and out it comes- much like my life, I tend to be impulsive and trudge right through things without much planning involved. 
When I sat down at the computer tonight, I started Pandora to my station that I have created of all my favorite songs and Jason Mraz, I Won't Give Up started playing. 
 Now this song is about a relationship, and I have always loved it and thought longingly about the relationship I will have one day whenever I hear it.  Well tonight it took on a different meaning- my relationship with this journey that I am on.
I won't give up- there will be times that I will lose my way but in the end "I don't wanna be someone who walks away so easily
I'm here to stay and make the difference that I can make."  I am in a relationship with this journey that I am on and I intend to stick it out and never give up.
I have definitly developed a realtionship with the treadmill, maybe a love hate one but definitly a relationship.  I have consistently walked 2 miles everyday this week and today pushed myself a little harder and went .2 farther. 
 When I first start walking I always think about how far I have to go and how much I hate it and I will never be able to hang in there and walk for 40 minutes and it is never going to end.  Then I sort of get in my groove and settle in for the haul.  Yesterday and today I even did 30/30 intervals for about 15 minutes (run for 30 seconds, walk for 30 seconds) and it was so much easier than attempting to just run until I can't anymore.  Dare I say that I actually liked it?  Oh the horrors - if myself from last summer could see me now!!  A BIG thank you to my cheerleader, Shannon, for pushing me toward this and her continued support and encouragement along this journey.  She is always there to urge me back into it when I have gotten lazy and I will forever be greatful!  Shannon also runs 30/30 intervals and I can only hope to one day have the endurance that she does. But for now, I am immensly happy with my progress and my developing relationship with my treadmill!

Even though I took a few weeks off, didn't count calories and basically threw caution to the wind with my eating, it isn't too late to get back involved and give it all i've got.  My new goal is to lose something, anything  before Christmas.  I have 4 weeks left to reach this goal- I am not putting a number on it because it is a short term goal and I don't want to set myself up for failure. Any loss if a loss and it will be even sweeter this time of year when losing is just plain harder than any other time. 
 So it's back at it and it really feels good.  I am more motivated and ready to see the results on the scale again- it has been too long.  Even though I haven't really gained per say- I have played with the same 2 pounds now for weeks- I am more than ready to bid good riddance to those pesky 2 pounds and then add more to it.  The fact that I have developed a relationship with the treadmill that is working for me is going to make it so much easier because finding good food choices that I am just not sick and tired of has been a challenge.  I will detail this better in my next blog post as I think I need to flesh it out a bit- oh watermelon and tomato sandwhiches how I miss you!
Until then,